Pre-Day 1

Tonight I am supposed to drink some senna tea, and I already had a tea called "Smooth Move" in the pantry but I think maybe I used it only once. I was supposed to start this whole plan two days from now, after my last day at my internship for the week, but I decided to start it early. I think I will be okay at my internship, or at least I am praying I will be, and I got so excited reading about other people's experiences doing this Cleanse online that I wanted to start it sooner rather than later. I just hope I can make it through these first few days which are supposed to be the hard part. The main thing I am nervous about is feeling nauseas or out of sorts with my digestive system. I have emetaphobia, which is a fear of vomitting. I have had it all my life, hence my explaining in my Background post how I used to skip a lot of meals when I felt anxious. I am mostly over the fears of nausea and throwing up, but I still get panic attacks about it from time to time. I know if I felt really nauseas like I was going to throw up, I would probably go into full panic mode. I can handle feeling like I am going to have diarrhea or stomach cramps, its just any sign of queasiness or feeling like I am about to throw up, and my adrenaline starts going haywire and I feel like I am not going to be able to cope. So especially if I feel this at my internship, I will be in pretty bad shape.

So my Smooth Move Tea is steeping still (it has to steep for 15 minutes). I made a really stupid move and had McDonalds as a kind of symbolic good bye to eating like shit, and now, what with the idea of this laxative rolling around in my belly with the McDonalds, I don't even think I will need the laxative cause my nerves are already making me feel like I am going to have the runs!

I will check back after tea time. Wish me luck!

Addendum: While my tea continues to steep, it just occurred to me that I have felt like I was coming down with a cold or sinus infection all day. I have had a bit of a headache and a pressure feeling behind my nose. I wonder if this will make it that much harder to do this Master Cleanse. On the flipside of the coin, I have heard this Master Cleanse can make all sorts of ailments go away as your body restores to its natural balance, so maybe it will help my sinuses clear out or something!

Okay I drank the whole cup of tea. Everything feels a-okay in my stomach so far. I believe the natural laxatives will probably take at least a few hours to work, so I am not expecting much. I just hope there aren't any fireworks!